Hey look my hair is a different colour!

...Just in case you didn't know. It's kind of exciting. And yes, this is a bathroom picture. Sorry, I just didn't have any other pictures, but I figured some people might want to see that haven't yet. So there you go!

If you walk away, I'll walk away...

So I'm sure anybody who's reading this knows that an unexpected turn of events has left me single. I'm not going to delve into it a whole lot, because I don't really know if I could be very articulate about my feelings yet. However, it's a good time for poetry. Some of this is old, some of it is new.


Untitled (I wrote this about a month ago, surprisingly, before the break-up. It seems to fit though.)

Then you left my side
with that look in your eyes
afraid that you wouldn't come back.

I twiddled my thumbs
my mouth feeling numb
and my heart screaming with fear.

No more words to say
just a look and a stay
and a last long squeeze of your hand.

And I left your side
with a look in my eye
knowing it will never be the same.

Yellow Trees (This and the next one were both written within the past couple days)

We met in a place
that we'd never been,
underneath yellow trees
between two logs hidden.

And we held each other
like never before,
underneath yellow trees
on a rocky shore.

We clung onto something
that just wasn't there,
I cried on your shoulder
and you stroked my hair.

After the last kiss
and walking apart,
we turned our backs
and walked off in the dark.

My eyes kept clouding
with a vision of your face,
I fought all those details
they kept falling in place.

I felt like the scene
after a storm had gone through,
the life gone from everything
made to start anew.

Picking up my pieces
my home swept away,
I need to let go of you
but I want you to stay.

So this morning, a heavy frost
snuck into my heart,
I'm afraid if it thaws
I'll fall completely apart.

Even if it hurts
I'm letting it stay,
since underneath yellow trees,
you and your love walked away.

The Window (Yep, same rhyme scheme as the last one. Sorry.)

The window we found on walk
fall leaves beneath our boots,
it stared at us with hopeful eyes
through dust and dirt and roots.

When we walked behind the window
I was curious to see,
what was behind those hopeful eyes?
It was our future- you and me.

Now I've decided to visit
that clairvoyant place again,
the muddy prints beneath the frost
are all the leaves have left.

Those hopeful eyes still gazed at me
more melancholy in them now,
maybe it was my imagination
or the surrounding snowy boughs.

I didn't need to search behind it
to know what I wouldn't find,
I went ahead and looked there still
but to provide my peace of mind.

And I realized then
no miracle happened there,
just my own hopeful eyes
and my own hopeful stare.

The past can be forgotten
but it cannot be replaced,
bits and pieces are left standing
never to be erased.

(And that's it for now.)

The inspiration for that last one was an actual window left standing that we found one day.

Again- criticism is appreciated!
No definition of perfection this time. Heh. Kind of difficult to find that right now, although I don't doubt it exists.

Thank you! Happy Holidays!

Hey. So yeah, it's been awhile. It's not like I'm not doing anything, though! Last weekend I had gingerbread weekend at my Grandma MacIntosh's, which is where we create a bunch of gingerbread and get obsessed about it all. That was really fun, and we also got a bunch of family pictures taken by some photographers that came. So I will post those pictures and pictures of the gingerbread as soon as I get them.
 Going backwards from there, I went to a dance class with someone from the Mark Morris Dance Company on Saturday morning. It was really fun because we did weird things with time signatures, which I haven't done a whole lot of in dance yet. We danced in 2, to a 3/4 time signature. For any band geeks that happen to read this, you already know that is called a Hemiola. I was stoked because I think I was the only one in the class who actually knew what he was talking about when he used the term. It was also cool because my dad and Jenny and I had seen the Mark Morris Dance Company at the Moore the previous night. The choreography was really clever, actually. That's the only way I can describe it.

Anyways, today, I'm working at my dad's work- doing some odd jobs etc. While folding their christmas cards, I saw the window washer outside on our window, in the rain/fog/mist- whatever you want to call it. Anyways, it looked like such a miserable day to be doing it, and an idea just jumped into my head. So I followed through with my impulse and wrote in my journal in big capital letters, "THANK YOU! HAPPY HOLIDAYS!" When I showed it to him, he waved and got a big grin on his face, and I got all warm and fuzzy inside. Hurray!

Definition of perfection: random acts of kindness
Also, probably Beecher's flagship grilled cheese sandwiches. Those are good too.

Out with the old, in with the bizarre.

We gather here today to celebrate two odd, yet (kind of) momentous occasions.
Yesterday, I experienced my first Thanksgiving with my dad and Jenny. (Yay.) This means theatre hopping for the entirety of the day while stopping in between only for dinner. We went to the Muppet Movie at the Cinerama at about 10 something in the morning, then on to Hugo 3D at the Regal Meridian, then Immortals 3D at Pacific Place. We stopped to let out the dogs at home and then had a turkey dinner at the Mecca Bar & Cafe. It even came with the largest slice of pumpkin pie in the world afterwards.
Yup, that's cranberry sauce in a to-go sauce cup.

Afterwards, we went to Le Havre at the Uptown. Hurray SIFF! (Seattle International Film Festival- they now own two movie theatres in town where they play really good indie films.) We love you!

So, good Thanksgiving. Needless to say, it went by very fast. 

Then, today, a second strange, new event took place- the deflowering of my once pristine laptop. I have an affinity for stickers, and it was only a matter of time before this affinity took over my computer. I tried to keep it clean for as long as I could, and, today, I gave in.

I'll keep adding to it. It still looks somewhat empty to me.

Definition of perfection: finding the perfect present for somebody else when you only walked into the store on a whim.

Perfection (Don't read this if you aren't in the mood for something sappy!)

Take heed of the warning in the title before you continue.

So, I've been having a hard time keeping up the blog, but it's really something I want to continue. I'm new to this, so forgive me if I write something that's completely uninteresting to you. I really only want to write things that are interesting to me, and often times I don't think about what's interesting to me, I just... am interested. Heh. I don't know if that makes sense, but whatevs.

I keep on thinking about what I want out of life. I mean, really, who doesn't? Lately, though, it seems it's all I think about anymore. So I decided to make a list. I might add to it as time goes on, but this is what I have for now.

All I really want out of life:

-I want to become a successful dancer. To me, this is not becoming prima ballerina in the New York Ballet. As much as I know that would be an amazing job, it's not what I want, and I know it's not realistic. To me, being a successful dancer would be to perform in an interesting company that's not afraid to do it's own thing for a little while, and then showcasing my choreography in a couple of well-attended shows.

-I want to own a cafe/bakery. I don't care when. Just at some point, I want to get really good at making coffee, tea, and baked goods.

-I want to not have to hide things about myself that I'm not ashamed of. I want to get better at not caring what others think.

-I want to learn how to paint things I think are beautiful.

-I want to do a temple stay at a buddhist temple. It doesn't have to be for long, maybe just a month.

-I want to see Neil Gaiman. I'd love to see the Shins but I don't think that will ever happen, seeing as James Mercer is doing the whole Broken Bells thing now. I want to keep going to shows when I'm older, and I don't want to be stuck in a certain decade for the rest of my life.

-I want to get voice lessons and get better at singing, and not be afraid to sing in front of people when I want to.

-I want to travel as much as I can, read as much as I can, and write as much as I can. It doesn't have to be published, although that would be nice.

-I want to end up living somewhere that I can see the stars at night. I want to have a pet goat, and a pet rabbit. I don't have to be wealthy, just well-off.

-I want to not be afraid of change. I want to be able to better myself all the time, and not reach an age and then just give up at being better. I want to always be myself, but I believe that "myself" can change, and should in some aspects.

These are just what I'm thinking about right now. They are subject to change. Not all of them may be realized, but I hope they are.
What got me thinking of this was what I'm going to call today's definition of perfection. The boyfriend and I went to Port Townsend today to get breakfast at Metro Bagels, and just bum around a bit, and when we got our (amazing!) breakfast bagels, with egg, cheese, avocado and butter, (mine on an everything bagel with onion) and our coffees, Cole said, "This is all I really want out of life. An awesome breakfast bagel and my girlfriend to share it with."

So, today's definition of perfection for me is: An awesome breakfast bagel and my boyfriend to share it with. ^^
I'll continue putting down occasional definitions of perfection, because I feel like they keep coming up, different all the time. That's all for now!

Hey, I wrote something!

Alright, so not much has been going on that anybody really wants to hear about. I've been working for my dad's company, thenewBlank, doing some production management type stuffy-stuff. Yep. Yayay. This weekend I'm visiting Port Angeles for my mom's birthday, my boyfriend's band's debut concert, and probably some visiting of friends that are back for Thanksgiving. So I'm looking forward to that.
In the meanwhile, I wrote a poem kind of thing today! I haven't in awhile! So I'm excited!

Untitled

I've stood here countless times before
one of them with you
so why is it
that's the only one I can remember?
That time, I took a picture
of the skyscraper with the rounded top,
straight in front of us, me,
against a bright blue sky with white clouds.
It was cool that day.
I tell myself
I remember that only
because it is always cool,
in Seattle.
Tonight, it stands
against a charcoal night.
The leaves on the trees planted in the sidewalk,
illuminated by lamposts,
are bright,
bright yellow.
Especially against
such black bark
and such charcoal night.
I am more aware of those around me,
but only because
it is night,
not because of the lack of company.
That time,
we rubbed each other's ears, and
talked
of forever.
Tonight, I think
of forever ago,
but only slightly.
I mostly think
of my disheveled hair in the reflection of the busses
as they come, stop, go.
I mostly think of
the bus I am looking for
and why isn't it here yet?
Why isn't it here now?
It was here for a moment,
while I
was a block away,
I saw it whip past me, and stop,
while I ran to catch it.
I was not too slow,
but my bus was too fast,
and- away.
So now I wait.
Other busses come, stop, go
and I direct my attention
to my reflection when they stop,
and to the bright yellow leaves
against the charcoal night
flying straight, fast, in the opposite direction
when they go.

Let me know what you think in the comments! Criticism is appreciated!

Seoul pt. 2

Hey all. I'm just going to pick up where I left off.
After Gyeongbok Palace we went to Insadong, which is kind of the artsy area of Seoul. It was really cute- all of the buildings were very different from one another and the alleys branching off from the main road were long and winding.
Ginko trees changing colour.

Alley.

The best example of resourcefulness- cabbage growing in a planter.  

Alley. 

Jamie and Cameron, his friend that we met up with while we were there. He was very nice, and he also bought us lunch and me a hat. (Cameron on right, Jamie on left.)

People in traditional Korean clothing. 

Two boys in traditional Korean clothing talking to a friend. 

Stabuckse coppee.

There were people that were making and selling these candies on the side of the street. These guys were really cool and when they were making the candies they would say the procedure out loud in a sing songy kind of way. They aren't doing that in this video but just to give you an idea...

I also saw a couple really cute kids while in Seoul.

After getting lunch and walking around a bit, it was time for me to go to the airport to fly home. So Jamie and Miya drove me to Incheon and said goodbye, and I was on my way.
Breakfast: Korean dunkin' donuts? haha.
Lunch: Spicy octopus and shiitake mushrooms
Dinner: airplane food! yay!
I'm missing Korea, but it's nice to be back too. This has been a great experience and I just wanted to thank all of those who supported me with going on this trip.

Goodbye, Korea... a.k.a. Seoul pt. 1

Welp, I'm back in Seattle. I really missed that specific Seattle-like chill in the air. I miss Korea though, also.
Today I'm going to talk about the last day in Korea- we went to Seoul, the major city of South Korea.
After getting up super early and (inevitably) sleeping in the car, we arrived in Seoul and went to Gyeongbok Palace, which was the King's palace. It was all torn down by the Japanese multiple times, and is currently (I think, I could be wrong) 40% reconstructed. They are still working to completely reconstruct it. It's already really big, so I know it has to have been absolutely huge.
Me in the yard where they used to practice their fighting skills.

The throne hall. You can see the separation in the path to the entrance... the center path was used only by the King and the outer two was for everyone else. You can see half of the center path and the right outer path in this picture.

The throne room.

On the ceiling was two dragons, which symbolized equal opposites, similar to the yin and yang symbol.

The royal army was parading through the palace while we were there. Later, when we already had left we heard drumming and saw them through the gate with brightly coloured banners doing the changing of the gaurd.  

A boat in the middle of a pond. 

Miya and I in front of the steps up to the National Folk Museum of Korea. She is taller than me, as you can see.  

Afterward, we met up with one of Jamie's old friends, who's english name was Cameron. He was really nice, and took us out to lunch at a restaurant where we had spicy  and shiitake mushrooms. I think I must've built up a little more tolerance to spicy food, because I don't know if I would have been able to handle how spicy this food was before I came here.

I think for now I'm going to leave it at that, because I have so many pictures from Seoul and I don't want to overwhelm anybody.

Breakfast: Korean Dunkin' Donuts on the road. Haha.
Lunch: Spicy octopus/shiitake mushroom, octopus pancake.

The following images may be considered disturbing. Just to warn you.

Hey! Today, we were going to go to Seoul, but since Jamie isn't feeling too good we decided to go to Seoul tomorrow (Sunday). Tomorrow I'm catching a plane to get back home.

Instead, Miya and I went to a cafe in Donghae while Jamie went to the doctor. It was another cafe where they roast their own coffee, and this one made their own chocolate too. I tried a green tea chocolate that was really good, and I had a pot of lotus blossom tea. We also played with a really cute puppy that lived there. His name was Ddongja, which means "Shit baby" in Korean.

Afterwards, Jamie picked Miya and I up and we went to Haesindang park. This park is also known as "Penis Park."

Yes, that IS me sitting on a giant statue of a penis.
The story behind this place is that a maiden who was engaged to a man went down to the beach with him to pick seaweed. She was out on a rock and he was back on land when a storm came and swept her out to sea. By the time he had gotten to her it was too late, and she had drowned. Since that day, the local fisherman weren't able to catch a single fish, until one fisherman peed off the side of the boat. Then,  they were able to catch fish. So they decided that meant that seeing they guy's penis had calmed her spirit, so they erected (no pun intended) statues to keep her happy.

The penis cannon.

Penis stools. 

Penis windchime things?

Roar! Now that's frightening.

One penis, with five baby penises coming out the top... 

A penis... with girl legs?

So yeah. Penis park... yay!
On the way home I caught a picture of the construction dummies that they have here in Korea that I mentioned in my Happy Halloween post.

Breakfast: Bagel and lotus tea

Lunch: Ddeok Ramyeon

Dinner: Mango Banana curry. (Didn't taste bananas or mangos in it. Jamie made it. It was good.) 

Tomorrow we go to Seoul really early and then I get on a plane at 6 pm. So I won't be posting tomorrow. 

And I'll leave you with this video of the Penis Cannon in full action!

UPDATE- Sorry that the video is sideways. I don't know how to fix that...

I am AWESOME at chopsticks!

It's true. Just kidding, it's probably not true. But I think I'm a lot better than I was when I first came here! Hurray!

Yesterday, (Thursday) was market day again. Didn't take many pictures, but I did buy some things including a pair of leggings and a tea set, both of which I am so excited about!
My baby!

Lunch: Dol Sat Bi Bim Bap
Dinner: Chinese! (very different from Chinese food in America)
Dessert: Ice cream inside a corn husk made out of the same thing as ice cream cones, layered with chocolate on the inside and with little bits of rice and corn in the ice cream. It was the most delicious thing in the world.

Today, I visited Jamie's school again... I got a picture with some of the girls. They were so cute and asked me lots of questions during their passing period. We talked about what musical instruments we played.
I feel so tall! Haha.

Lunch: Squid, Kimchi, Rice
Dinner: Ohyadeok jolim (This stuff was delicious. Squid, lettuce, mushrooms, and peppers in a spicy sauce.)

A couple posts ago I mentioned that Koreans are very resourceful people. I wanted to give you an example of how they are so resourceful.
These pictures are taken right outside Jamie and Miya's apartment. Every spare bit of space is used to either grow or prepare food. Gardens are everywhere.
Drying persimmons off of a balcony.

 Drying seeds.

 Growing a squash plant or something that's hanging between two trees.

There's huge gardens surrounding the apartment, and one of them even has manta rays drying out on a rack.

Yeah, so I thought I'd share that with you guys. Also I'd like to share this song, that I have stuck in my head. YAY K-POP!!!! (Most k-pop is really bad, but catchy, and the choreographed dances are fun and cute. I think Miss A probably are the most talented out of the groups I've seen.)

And I'll leave you with that. Know what song's going to be stuck in your head for the rest of the week? 

Chincha gwiyeoweo toki! (Really cute bunny!)

Hi! Let's talk about bunnies. I've been staying with my Uncle Jamie and Aunt Miya and they have two bunnies, Rumor and Monsu. I wanted to introduce them to you.

Monsu!

 Rumor!

They are cute bunnies and they are finally letting me pet them. Yay! 

Okay, so the past couple of days (Tuesday and Wednesday) I haven't really done anything new. Tuesday I went to chuam beach again, and explored a little more, and read my book. 

There are lots of cats at Chuam.

Cat.

 Cat.

Cute family.

Three cats!

Baby with grandma?

Cat.

Breakfast: cereal. Lunch: Seafood fried rice. Dinner: Pho

And the next day, Wednesday, I went up to Mureung Valley again and hiked up to the twin falls. The leaves were more colourful this time.

Kay. Yeah. Point taken? Moving on.

Breakfast: Cereal!

Lunch: Deok gook su, Jean kalgook su. (Two types of soup. I wasn't a super fan of either, but they were alright.)

Dinner: Korean Barbeque! (The real deal.)

And then that night we watched Totoro. And Jordan was happy. The end.